Limp Dicks And Saggy Tits by Tracie Podger

 

Book: Limp Dicks & Saggy Tits

Author: Tracie Podger

Genre: Romantic Comedy

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✫.•° Synopsis °•.✫

What to do when your husband runs off and leaves you single—when being single is not your thing?

Lizzie has decided that single life does not suit her.

From castles in Scotland to barns in Kent, via apartments in London, she embarks on a journey of self-discovery as a single woman with all the humorous pitfalls along the way.

Naked artists, extreme earth lovers, taxidermy, and blow up dolls, are just some of the encounters Lizzie has to endure in her effort to get her life back on track.

With the dashing Scot, Ronan, by her side, will she ever be able to do that?

Or will his mountain of baggage just pile alongside hers creating an impenetrable wall between them?

✫.•° Book Links °•.✫

Goodreads | Amazon UK | Amazon US

✫.•° My Review °•.✫

I’m not a big reader of this genre, in fact, I can count on one hand the amount of romantic comedies I’ve read this year. Limp Dicks and Saggy Tits is incredibly funny, when I say funny, I mean laugh-out-loud funny. I was reading this in my doctors waiting room and being stared at by everyone because I was sat in the corner laughing so much I was crying!

In Limp Dicks and Saggy Tits, we meet Lizzie, who is Lizzie? Lizzie is a 50-year-old single star of this book. She has decided single life isn’t for her. The problem is just how does she re-enter the world of Dating? (Seriously, I’m not even 40 and I wouldn’t have a clue!)

We follow the newly divorced Lizzie as she begins the self-discovery and dating chapter of her life. She starts off by taking dating advice from her best friend Joe. Lizzie takes that on board but then decides to throw caution to the wind and be spontaneous. It’s this spontaneity that leads her to Scotland and eventually to Kent.

Lizzie finds herself in some pretty funny and sometimes crazy situations. Pat the Cat and the weight loss item are just a couple of the funny bits! If I was in Lizzie’s situation I don’t know if I’d be any better or different either.

Ronan is a Scottish enigma. He brings so much to this story; he really does add to the funniness. The castle in Scotland, WOW, what a place! Although that’s not what I expected to hear happening within its grounds though 😉

Tracie’s writing style has adapted to fit this genre well. Tracie has written a light-hearted, funny story of self-discovery and life after divorce. I think the mix of funny, laugh out loud moments and romance is well suited to these characters and this story.

If you want a book that is light-hearted, giggle-worthy and captivating then I would certainly recommend Limp Dicks and Saggy Tits.

Even if romantic comedies aren’t normally your thing, this book is definitely worth taking a chance on.

✫.•° Meet the Author °•.✫

Tracie Podger currently lives in Kent, UK with her husband and a rather obnoxious cat called George. Shes a Padi Scuba Diving Instructor with a passion for writing. Tracie has been fortunate to have dived some of the wonderful oceans of the world where she can indulge in another hobby, underwater photography. She likes getting up close and personal with sharks.
Tracie likes to write in different genres. Her Fallen Angel series and its accompanying books are mafia romance and full of suspense. A Virtual Affair, Letters to Lincoln and Jackson are angsty, contemporary romance, and Gabriel, A Deadly Sin and Harlot are thriller/suspense. The Facilitator is erotic romance.

✫.•° Books by Tracie Podger °•.✫

Fallen Angel, Part 1
Fallen Angel, Part 2
Fallen Angel, Part 3
Fallen Angel, Part 4
Fallen Angel, Part 5
Fallen Angel, Part 6
The Fallen Angel Box Set
Evelyn – A novella to accompany the Fallen Angel Series
Rocco  A novella to accompany the Fallen Angel Series
Robert  To accompany the Fallen Angel Series
Travis  To accompany the Fallen Angel Series
Taylor & Mack  To accompany the Fallen Angel Series
Angelica  To accompany the Fallen Angel Series
A Virtual Affair  A standalone
Gabriel  A standalone
The Facilitator  A standalone
A Deadly Sin  A standalone
Harlot  A standalone
Letters to Lincoln  A standalone
Jackson  A standalone
The Freedom Diamond  A novella

✫.•° Stalker Links °•.✫

http://www.TraciePodger.com
Come on over to Tracie’s reader’s group to keep up to date on news:

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Declan (Wounded Heroes #1) by Ava Manello

Declan (Wounded Heroes #1) by Ava Manello – FREE FOR TODAY ONLY

War almost destroyed them, but they survived thanks to their brother in arms Declan.

Coming home wasn’t as sweet as they’d hoped, lives had moved on without them. For one it was all too much.

United by grief and angered by injustice the Wounded Heroes vow to always be there for each other.

Little do they know that’s going to come sooner rather than later.

#MilitaryRomance, #MCRomance, #AvaManello, #kindleunlimited,

Amazon: http://geni.us/Declan

Declan Trailer: https://youtu.be/AQ3cFNDT5pE

Declan excerpt:
http://avamanello.co.uk/excerpt-from-declan-wounded-heroes-1-by-ava-manello/

Finding Melodie by Laura Rossi

╔✫.•°*”˜⚘˜”*°•.✫✫.•°*”˜⚘˜”*°•.✫╗ 

⚘░N░E░W░ ░R░E░L░E░A░S░E░⚘ 

╚✫.•°*”˜⚘˜”*°•.✫✫.•°*”˜⚘˜”*°•.✫╝

FINDING MELODIE 
By Laura Rossi 

Book Link
books2read.com/u/3krK1O

.• Blurb •.

My name is Melodie and I’m in love with a guy, but he doesn’t know.
He walks by every day, I catch him staring, listening to me sing and play my guitar. I don’t even know his name.
Crazy I know but I can’t stop thinking about Office Guy. That’s what I secretly call him, Office Guy.
We’ve never even spoken to each other, but then one day he walks up to me and…

.•My Review •.

Finding Melodie is a short and a very sweet book.

Melodie is a pink haired Pixie, she loves music and helping “lost causes”, she’s a bartender and a busker, she lives in London with her two gay roommates. In the past she has always picked the wrong guys, she’s been hurt more than once, but she can’t help falling for the wrong ones. Even after that she still believes in love and romance.

Melodie busks in London, in a popular area and as she still by, she makes up her own stories about them and their lives. Some people even have their own names; like Office Guy. She has quite the crush on him and has often fantasised about Office Guy being her dream man. One day he approaches her and asks for help. He asks Melodie to play a certain song whilst he proposes to his girlfriend. Melodie is kinda heartbroken and a little bit jealous, but she puts a smile on her face and agrees to help him.

Office Guy is a real geeky nerd, he’s a bit of a workaholic and the off shoot of that results in heartache but also in an unsuspected friendship and adventure.

Then she watches as things take an unexpected turn and decided that she has to help Office Guy.

This book focuses on Melodie and Office Guy’s friendship and follows their journey.

I’m not going to discuss the plot further for fear of giving too much away.

The characters are incredibly endearing, I couldn’t help but feel like a part of their story. The character show depth and realism, they interact well together.

The book was a pleasure to read, it is packed full of laugh out loud moments, emotion and a little bit of hotness too. During the plan to win back the woman Office Guy loves, each of them discovers more about themselves, their friendship grows, and their feelings change.

Laura’s writing style makes it is very easy to get caught to win the characters’ lives and their feelings. The emotion contained within its pages consumed me as I was reading this. Finding Melodie is a tale of unexpected love, it shows that you can find love, even when you least expect it.

 

.•Stalker Links •.

Sign up for my newsletter: http://eepurl.com/cZAwD1

Blog: https://laurarossiauthor.wordpress.com

Facebook Fan Page: https://www.facebook.com/laurarossiauthor/

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Amazon: http://amzn.to/2wXDcWK

#Newrelease, #outnow, #indieauthor, #Melodie, #officeguy, #books, #romance, #romcom, #amazon, #kindleunlimited, #ebooks, #Paperbacks, #bookstagram, #bookaholic, #bookworms, #bookstagram, #laurarossi

Skins & Scars by Laura Rossi

✫.•° Skins by Laura Rossi °•.✫

✫.•° Blurb °•.✫

My name is Sebastian, but they call me the Killer. I have never lost a fight; never let anyone touch me without regretting it. I am a fighter, that’s how I survive in the gutter that is The Market, a neighborhood in the outskirts of Rome.

Rome, the city of eternal beauty. But also the city of lost souls. When gangster Alejandro de la Crux wanted to have a word with me, I had no idea what was coming. He wanted me- the Killer- to protect his ex-wife and his son, while he went into hiding. Someone wanted him dead, wanted all of them dead. I had no idea it was Andrea, the woman I had met years before, the woman I had lost my head for.

It was her. She needed help. And I wasn’t going to let anyone touch her, not even her ex-husband Alejandro de la Crux.

Excerpt:
“He’s going to kill us if he finds out” she told me. “I am going to hell anyway” I whispered in her ear, before moving down to kiss her again. “I am coming with you” she murmured against my mouth.

✫.•° Book Links °•.✫

Goodreads | Amazon UK | Amazon US

✫.•° My Review °•.✫

This is the first book by Laura Rossi I have read, let me say now it won’t be the last.

I was completely captivated by the story and characters, Sebastian and Angela both grew on me, making me feel as though I was part of their story. Sebastian and Angela experience so much in this book, but no matter what they face they seem to continue to meet it head on and continue to fight for what they believe in.

Laura has written an epic rollercoaster of emotions, her talented words are like a fishing rod loaded with bait, I was the fish that took the bait and was then reeled in hook line and sinker! I was pulled into this story alongside Sebastian and Angela, I felt their emotions as if they were my own.

Laura’s writing style captivated my attention in kept me hooked until the very end, even then I still wanted more. As the story unfolded I was kept trying to guess just what was coming next, each time I thought I knew I was met by another twist that I did not see coming.

Skins is a story that I won’t forget easily it safe to say that Skins made it onto my list of 2018 top reads. I’m looking forward to reading Scars.

✫.•° Scars: Sequel to Skins °•.✫

✫.•° Blurb °•.✫

I gasped for air and counted my last breaths.

One, pain shot up my stomach.

Two, my throat burned.

I kept looking at the sky, as I lost any will to move.

Before my eyes closed, my last thoughts were for Andrea.

They thought prison would change me, that isolation would make me weak, maybe break me. But I wasn’t alone, I always had the darkness with me.

My name is Alejandro De la Crux and I never let anyone cross me without paying the price, their lives for my honour.

I was left to rot in prison by my ex wife and her lover, The Killer. That Rat.

They thought they could run away from me, that they could live happily ever after. No one can fool the devil, no one can fool Alejandro De la Crux.

“Patience, revenge takes time. But it will come, my time will come.

Note to reader: Scars is the sequel to Skins. Although the book can be read as a standalone, reading the prequel Skins is highly recommended to fully understand the characters and the series of events described in the story.

✫.•° Book Links °•.✫

Goodreads | Amazon UK | Amazon US

✫.•° My Review °•.✫

Firstly, let me start by saying wow!!

This is the sequel to Skins; which not only did I rate 5 stars but also was one of my top reads of 2018 so far; I did not expect Scars to rival that position, but it does.

I’m going to try so hard to write this review without giving anything away.

Scars is written in 3 different POV’s; Andrea, Sebastian and Alejandro; it’s perfectly clear who’s POV you’re reading and when. The 3-person POV works extremely well in the book as it allows us into the mind of each character. It allows us to understand the thoughts and feelings of each of them. Scars gives us an insight into the mind of an obsessive monster; Alejandro, as well as the intelligent and protective minds of Andrea and Sebastian.

These characters have grown and developed so much they are so intense and complex, just when you think you know them they show yet another side or layer. With each of these new layers, I found myself loving or hating them more.

The emotion in this book is palpable, and it’s not just the emotion from the characters but the emotion that Laura has put into her writing. More than once I found I was either holding my breath or my heart was pounding, I also found myself extremely close to tears.

Laura’s writing style is incredibly clear and shows her natural talent for writing a darker more twisted story, although I haven’t yet read her other work. The way Laura switches from one POV to the other seems effortless and seamless. The characters had already worked their way under my skin after reading Skins, now they are firmly in my heart.

Overall this book is amazing, however, you MUST read Skins first!!

If you want an intricately woven web of intense, gripping, gut-wrenching, breathtaking suspense, with action and an epic tale of love then this is the book; well 2 books for you!

Well done Laura!!

✫.•° Stalker Links °•.✫

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